Tuesday, 12 August 2008

I may look stupid, but I still don't believe a fucking word out of your lying rat mouth

Hi, my name is dan and I am a millionaire with a 12 foot cock and my IQ is 14 billion.*

Everyone knows a fucking idiot that comes out with some shit like this trying desperately to get you to somehow believe them. I know 3 or 4 people like this, and I won't name names but you know the type, the kind of idiot that lies directly to your face and you know they are lying, they know they are lying but yet they still say it. How stupid do you think I am? Not only do I have an IQ of 14 million and can see through your ridiculous claims but it is common knowledge that you tell more pork pies than a an insurance broker.

Fair enough, everyone exaggerates their stories, and I am particularly good at that, speak to me for more than 10 minutes I will probably tell you some story about my childhood that I will exaggerate certain aspects for comedic effect. Having said that, a cold faced lie is beyond me. How crap must your life be to decided to invent a new one in your head then spend most of your day lying through your teeth to try and convince people that you are not lying. Some other people do this for a living, they are called politicians**

The thing that grinds me about all this is that the lies get bigger and bigger, and eventually get out of hand and they will lie to their friends about having a terminal disease or getting raped or something else that the vast majority would be gutted by. What the fuck has happened in their life that they feel the need to lie about death and rape? scratch that, I don't care what happened, fuck off and stop lying about important things. You don't fuck about with other peoples emotions just because you feel like it.

These same people then inevitably get found out to be the lying rats they are and then they somehow decide that they are the victim, and that everyone else is lying. How stupid do you think I am? I have listened to you tell whopping great lies every day and then you accuse other people of lying. Wow I am convinced! you must be telling the truth as you are so well known for it.

In conclusion, I hate liars - grow up and if you cant think of anything truthful to say, then don't say anything at all.***

*Despite the fact this blog is about compulsive liars, this statement is completely true. I keep my money in my loft and my mum won't let me get it out, and I lost a leg when I was 12, I use my cock to keep balance, and I am much more cleverer than that Steven Hawkman.

** Or con-men as they are more widely known. I prefer the term bloodsucking parasitic cunts.

***come to think of it, just don't say anything ever. The world will thank you in the long run.